A mile in my shoes--Hers

It had turned into a rough day of treatment.   I had a reaction to some contrast that was shot into my porta-cath.  It made me sick and very hot.   I was sitting at the hospital cafeteria staring at soup in front of me and trying not to shake too visibly as I fought nausea and pain.   A lady materialized in front of me.  She was a woman with gray hair and nicely manicured nails.  She said that she noticed my scarf and then she told me that she was a five year cancer survivor.  She told me that she lost her hair, her eyelashes, eye brows and her fingernails.  Then she assured me that they all grow back.  Suddenly I found myself fighting tears.  Here we both were sitting in a cafeteria of wigged and scarfed heads and she chose me to encourage and be kind to.  I was so touched.

About 30 minutes later, Cecil and I were waiting for our pastoral care appointment and it was going to be delayed for a bit.  This was good because I had taken pain and nausea meds and they had not kicked in yet.   A lady turned towards us and asked,  do you want to talk while you wait?   I have to be honest with you, I was still feeling sick so I really didn't want to talk but something about her caught my attention.   She turned fully towards Cecil and I and we saw that she was blind.  She took her cane and made her way to a chair near us.  She was a volunteer at the Clinic.   She is there to chat with folks and even though her eyes were gone, she saw my need to talk more than I did.   She explained to us that she had cancer about 10 years before.  It was brain cancer located behind her left eye.  She had not been treated at the Clinic because it was not there at the time.  The radiation she recieved blasted away the turmor in her brain but also fried her optical rods and left her blind.  Without hesitation, she declared, "I lost my sight but I kept my life!"   She also told me that her husband had lost 3 of his five siblings to cancer and now he has a wife who is blind from cancer treatment.  She gave no indication that he was bitter.    She asked me about my cancer and I told her what little I know about it.  She was a great listener.   She said she had volunteered at the clinic for almost year and she loves it.  She wished me well and told me I was going to be fine.

Again, I was humbled by a stranger's kindness.   This place is full of those types of stories.   Cancer may bring us all together but it is the spirit of grace and kindness that connects the hearts.   Could it be that cancer will make me a more whole person?  I hope so.